Final (part) Four

No, not about basketball. I don't care about basketball. Besides, I think that was last month? I really have no idea. If it's not football, I don't care. :)

Final entry of 100 facts! Head to Megan Writes to join in!



Nope, still don't know how to grab a button. Oh well.

76. My right leg is an inch or so shorter than my left. This is because of a car accident I was in a few years ago. In addition to screwing up my back, it apparently did something to my pelvis. Every so often, I get a blinding shooting pain in my right hip and it won't feel better until I pop the hip back in place. I've been told by several doctors that's a bad idea. But it's the only thing that makes it feel better. So I ignore them.
77. I don't think technology replaces talent. Just because you have an awesome camera doesn't mean you're a photographer. It means you have an awesome camera.
78. I didn't eat chicken until I met my husband. My dad likes it very dry, so that's how my mom always made it. I hated it.
79. I normally only drink water. I don't usually buy soda, but if I go out to eat, I'll get one.
80. However, I can't have caffeine, so I really only drink Sprite and root beer - but only Mug and A&W. Coke - entirely unnecessarily - adds caffeine to Barq's. Thanks.
81. The reason I can't have caffeine *(yes, even chocolate, along with red wine, citrus, onions, nuts, strong cheese, and a few other things)* is because there is a part of my brain that doesn't 'tolerate' something in all of those things and I'll end up with a migraine. I ignore a lot of that though and just hope for the best. It is one thing to take away my chocolate, but oranges too? Try again.
82. I still haven't hung our ball picture or Bug's school pictures because I get annoyed with how much a frame costs. It's four tiny pieces of wood nailed together. It should not cost more than $10.
83. I always want our house to have one more bedroom than necessary so we can have a guest room. When I was little, we only had enough room for us, and I was always the one kicked out when a guest came. I hated that.
84. I have a list for our house when we stop moving. It mostly involves the kitchen, my closet, and our wrap around porch.
85. I swear Bug has radar for when I stop paying full attention to her. When I am, she ignores me. As soon as I start doing something else, she wants nothing more than to be with me.
86. I'm tired of trying to explain to Bug that you can be skinny and pretty, but you don't have to be skinny to be pretty.
87. She has clearly lost her mind since her father left. I get it, but it's driving me up a wall.
88. I get annoyed by military spouses who complain about the military all the time, especially if you married AFTER enlisting. I get that parts suck, but seriously, you should have thought about it. This does NOT mean "you knew what you were getting in to," this means stop bitching all the time about everything. We're dealing with the same shit.
89. I have a very large vocabulary *(hello, English major)* but sometimes, I still think the F bomb is the best way to express myself.
90. If I could remember each language I have learned, I would speak seven: English, French, Spanish, Russian, Italian, German, and ASL.
91. I hate when my toenails aren't painted. I think the longest I've gone since I was 13 was a week without them being painted. It was weird.
92. But I always do my own toes. I think feet are gross and I don't like mine being touched or touching/being touched by other's. B knows this and uses it against me.
93. On paper, my husband is a horrible match for me. I used that as an argument before we started dating until my mom told me to shut up and get over it. Thanks mom!
94. I started writing a short story in college and still haven't finished it. The teacher reading it to the class as an example of 'everything good' about short story writing was one of my proudest moments.
95. In high school, I used to dye my hair crazy colors - pink, blue, green, purple. It never really worked because my hair is practically black. I'm pretty sure that's why I did it - I could say I tried, and looked bad ass, but it didn't take. Not my fault. I tried to be awesome and out there. Isn't that lame?
96. For years, I have known the names of my to be born children. I had a first and second place name for both girls and boys. Now, when I'm actually at the point of maybe having children to name, I think I like the second place names better.
97. I have a deep urge to paint a bathroom aqua. Or fuschia. I just think it would be so fun. B would never go for it.
98. The conversations I have with Bug never cease to amaze me. For example, we just had a five minute conversation about why her last poop hurt. Oh motherhood.
99. I want to learn how to whistle using my fingers.
100. I have been going to the gym on a fairly regular basis. I'm pretty proud of myself, but I feel like SUCH a slacker fast walking on the treadmill for 20 minutes next to some chick running for an hour. I mean, to be fair, I do treadmill AFTER elliptical, but still. B keeps reminding me that I have to start somewhere, and at least I'm at the gym. He's so good. :)

Heyyyyyyyy! I did a blogging thing and kept at it! Hurrah! I'm going to try to post more regularly now - this was such good motivation.

Part 3

Soooo maybe, really what I needed as motivation was to kick my husband out. Haha. I'm kiiiiidding. ...kind of. Really, I think I just have all that 'us' time free now, and what better way to spend it than doing something I love? Even if no one else reads this, it certainly makes me feel better. Anyway, to continue with the fun 100 Facts started by Megan Writes, here we go!


51. My laptop is really old and sucks, so I'm using my husband's. But I hate it. the keyboard is weird and the mouse pad is so insanely sensitive. Half the time I don't even realize I have touched it. I wish I had enough money to buy myself a new one.
52. My heritage is Irish, German, and Polish. But really, I'm American. I love the traditions and what not that I've learned from my grandparents, but I get really annoyed when people talk about how whatever they are. Were you born there? Then you're not. You're American. It's not uncool.
53. I almost got in a bar fight in London a few years ago because I had a Support Our Troops bracelet on and refused to accept that I shouldn't. This was years before I met my husband.
54. I get really bad migraines. I know what the cause is 95% of the time. The other 5% of the time, I'm convinced my sister was right when she said there was a tumor in my brain - even though she was only teasing and only saying it because of Kindergarten Cop - It's not a tumor!
55. I get so involved in some books that they affect my day and my mood. It's kind of weird.
56. I'm having some testing done with the doctors *(nothing too crazy, I'm just having issues focusing and remembering things)*, but I'm always afraid that they are going to find something seriously wrong with me.
57. Yet I can't stop myself from wanting to joke about hearing the voices. I haven't said anything yet, but ohhhh how I want to.
58. There's not much gray area in my life. It's always been pretty black or white. Some people say it's too harsh, I just say I fully believe in my decisions.
59. I don't like when people tell me I can't do something. I may not have wanted to do it, but don't tell me I can't. And I don't just mean, "Oh, you'd never jump off that cliff," *(which I totally did)*, but things like banning abortion and gay marriage. How does me doing that affect you? It doesn't. So leave me alone.
60. I want to de-friend about 20 people on Facebook, but I'm afraid they'd notice and ask why. I couldn't handle that confrontation - what would I say? I got tired of reading your crap?
61. Sometimes, I really think Military Wives should rule the world. I mean, seriously. What can't we do?
62. I can pick up almost anything with my feet.
63. I really over think things. I am sitting here trying to come up with deep details about myself, when really, I could just say my favorite color is pink. No one who reads this really knows me, so why I am thinking so much?
64. I want to be one of those girls who can wear any color nail polish. I feel stupid wearing most of them.
65. I love old musicals. When I was younger, I wanted to marry Gene Kelly. I cried the day he died.
66. My degree is in English, yet I feel like I can never really articulate my feelings.
67. I hate when I don't know what a word means. But I don't own a dictionary. I really never have.
68. I do, in fact, judge a book by its cover. First the picture *(even though I know author almost definitely had no involvement there)*, then the back summary. If I'm not impressed with the cover, I don't bother. If I get to the back summary, and am still not impressed, no go.
69. I want a Mastiff.
70. But I kill everything. I've literally never kept a plant alive - I even killed a cactus - and so far, in one week, I've managed to kill two fish. And no, I don't know how.
71. If I didn't 'end' a friendship, I usually assume it's because the person got tired of me. But I don't get upset by that. I have gotten tired of people, so I get the feeling. Is that weird?
72. I want another tattoo, but I don't know what. Or where to put it. I don't want them on my upper body. I regret putting one on my foot. I already have two on my hips. I mean...what's left?
73. After B, I tell my sister the most.
74. This weekend, I FINALLY guessed the gender of a baby correctly. This is probably the 15th time I've guessed, and I'm never right. I was so excited!
75. I feel like there is a lot of unnecessary stuff in my house, but I rrrrrrreeeeeeaaaaaaalllllllllyyyyy don't want to be the one to clean it out.

Alright, off to bed for now. We've had such a busy weekend that Bug fell asleep on the couch. I guess I should move her. :)

Frustrated

So B is gone for a while, but only to NC, as I've mentioned. This separation has so truly shown that all the stupid little details need to be talked about BEFORE you are separated. Like we learn/teach at LINKS, you need to discuss all kinds of aspects of your lives and relationship before a separation to help each other know what to expect.

Well, we didn't really discuss money - I said, oh my god, what if I need money? He said, use your credit card, then pay it from my bank account. *(No, we don't have joint accounts. We kind of never got around to it, are now doing fine with out it, and it has kind of become one of our silly arguments. We'll get there someday, I'm sure. Haha. However, my credit card is set up to be paid from his bank account, so when I do need money from him, that's what we do.)* So the money thing is fine. I have POA for the kid and the cars, my name is on the lease for the house, so that's fine.

Anyone see what we didn't talk about?

Communication.

I know. It's a little one. Especially since he's just on the mainland, not Afghanistan, or Japan, or anything like that.

He's in North Carolina.

He has his cell phone. As long as we remember time difference, it should be fine, right?

Except we never talked about it!

I, being a girl, was so excited about the fact that he was just going to be in NC, that I figured we'd talk every day. Granted, we didn't need a marathon phone call every day, maybe just a few texts and if we got lucky, a quick phone call. I knew it would be hard, since I would be asleep when he woke up, he'd be busy when I woke up, I'd be at work when he was done with work, and he'd be asleep when I was done with work. But that's why there is text messaging, right? Super easy - send a few sentences, answer when you can. We both sleep through them, so it's not like we even had to worry about waking each other up. So in my head, we were fine and had a plan.

Except.

He's a guy. And a Marine, to boot. *(No pun intended.)* So he's totally mission focused - as in, he doesn't have "time" to talk. He works, and then when he's done with his work, he's either studying for work or making new friends.

It's getting frustrating.

He's been gone a little over a week. We've talked on the phone twice. He sometimes responds to my text messages.

At one point, he actually told me I had to let him miss me. WHAT?

I will admit, I was probably texting a lot when he first left. After all the times we've been away from each other when that was not an option, I was so excited that it was this time! Clearly, he's not on the same page.

I almost lost it because I'm doing some stuff with my doctor that had questions that he had to answer about me. I was so annoyed with the situation that I didn't really explain anything. I finally - maybe rudely. Ok, definitely rudely. - explained the situation and emailed him. He did respond and that was taken care of, thank goodness.

But still, I almost lost it.

Yesterday, he drove from NC to my parent's house to spend the weekend with them. Insert jealousy. That was when I got the second phone call. So in addition to being annoyed, I'm jealous. And I think I'm PMSing because I've been super snappy all day long. Poor Bug.

I think the worst part is that I haven't said anything to him. Girlishly, I do kind of want him to realize that he's ignoring me and fix out without me having to tell him. But I also don't really want to bother him. He's in NC for a pretty important thing, and I want him to be relaxed and in control so he can do well.

So for now, I simmer. And hopefully calm the hell down.

In other news, did you know that in one of the Rugrats' movies, Bruce Willis voiced Spike? How random...

25 Part 2

It's going to be hard to come up with 25 more, but I am really digging this so I'm going to give it a shot.

Head to Megan Writes to do the same!


I still don't know how to 'grab a button.' Sigh. I'll figure it out one day...maybe.

Anyway, on to the facts!

26. I don't answer my phone if I don't recognize the number. Even if I'm expecting a phone call.
27. I am terrified of spiders, but living in Hawaii has made it a necessity to no longer freak out and just kill the stupid things. I guess that's a good thing.
28. I love giving advice, but I'm always scared that I am going to tell the person the wrong thing. I try to just help guide the person and not outright say what I think they should do.
29. I miss my husband's friends from NC. They were great guys, and we don't have a group of them here yet.
30. I love reading celebrity gossip, but only on the internet. I'm not paying for that nonsense.
31. It's 10.30 Sunday morning. My house is clean. I have no errands. I don't know what I'm going to do the rest of the day. I don't like that.
32. I want to be a teacher, but I'm afraid I won't be any good at it. And I don't want to be a bad teacher and screw up kids.
33. I think I have a pretty good sense of humor, but I miss a lot of jokes. For some reason, I just don't get them.
34. I love crime shows and wish I could do that, but I don't want to be a cop. And working for NCIS or something like that would not really work being married to a Marine.
35. Speaking of jobs I can't have, I feel like I have given up a lot to be married to B, but I don't regret a single one because I know he's the right person for me to spend the rest of my life with.
36. I wish I had an accent. Southern, NY, British, whatever. It'd be fun. I can adopt them all, but it's not the same thing.
37. I sometimes forget how old I am when I am shopping for clothes and pick things up and go, Oh. I am not 20 anymore. Dammit.
38. I want to know how to get rid of the internal working mom vs. stay at home mom debate. I wasn't prepared for it to be so hard to decide.
39. I don't like to cuddle. 95% of the time, I don't want to be touched. This is hardest for Bug. She wants to touch and be cuddled all the time. And I love her dearly, but it drives me nuts.
40. I love cooking and am not bad at it. But I want to be able to come up with my own recipes that are just blow-your-mind-awesome.
41. In an attempt to keep Bug a little girl and not one of those annoying too grown up tweens, I fight people about letting her do stuff. She's four, she does not need to get a mani/pedi. She doesn't need 451638 Barbies. She will NEVER have a Bratz doll. No Hannah Montana, iCarly, anything like that. No pretend boyfriends, no cell phones, etc. I don't care if this seems overprotective. I want my kid to be a kid. Not one of those insane 8 year olds who acts like she's 16.
42. If I could, I would rearrange all the rooms in my house probably once a month.
43. When we stop moving, I want to have a fair amount of land because I want a lot of dogs. But I don't want to have to walk them everyday.
44. I haven't been to Europe since 2008 and I think it's slowly killing me.
45. I am super proud of the fact that my husband is a Marine, and he has totally brainwashed me in to thinking that the Marine Corps is the best branch by far. It's bad.
46. I could spend all weekend reading and be totally happy. Bug would not like it.
47. I truly do not understand my Mother-in-Law. I love her and appreciate her, but we are so incredibly different, I just don't 'get' her. But I don't think she gets me either.
48. I'm not religious, but I carry my grandmother's rosary in my purse at all times. It's in a special pouch with a set of B's dog tags, a special coin he gave me for our first deployment together, and one of Bug's hair things. I consider it my lucky bag.
49. I hate math, but I am so proud of myself when I figure a math problem out. It's one of my favorite challenges. But I hate it.
50. I miss my sorority and my sisters way more than I thought I would when I graduated. It sounds stupid, but you really do make amazing relationships with your sisters. Still one of the best decisions I've ever made. <3 Phi Mu.

Ok,that one took a lot longer than the first one. I'm interested to see how the next two go!

Finally Friday

Quitting time? I wish. Sometimes, I don't know why I insist on working. Haha.

Anyway. That's totally not the point of my writing today. Though, technically, I'm not sure I have a point.

B left yesterday. He got there safely this morning, our time. What a flight. I am not looking forward to having to do it again, even if the next time is going to be in three years.

I'm waiting for everything in my life to realize that he's gone and things to start breaking, falling apart, etc. I did just go to the bathroom and heard something in the vent. With legs. Not excited about that, but I am just going to continue in the happy thought that whatever it is is stuck in the vent and can only get out of the house. Not in. We are going with that, ok?

I have to say though, I really am interested in finding out how I do this separation. Last time I really did have SO much help, and here I have one friend. Ok, well, I have more than that, but really only one who I know will help with Bug.

Anyway, as another distraction, I am joining the 100 Facts blog posts going on. I am entirely clueless as to how to 'grab a button,' so I'm going to write the blog link and just copy the picture. I'm so lame, I know. Megan Writes is the website that started this!


See? It's a super cute button, but I literally have no idea how to make it a link. I'm hopeless some days.

So here are my 25 facts - I'm way late to the game so I'm going to be behind, but I'll try my hardest to get to 100.

1. I generally don't mind watching kid's shows with Bug. In fact, I prefer some of them to adult shows.
2. I can't wait to have more babies. But I'm acting like I am totally not ready so that I don't get hounded by family and friends about when I'm finally going to get knocked up.
3. I get frustrated when people tell me that Bug being a good kid is by chance. No, it's not. B and I worked hard to make her a good kid.
4. I'm still afraid to go to sleep without another adult in the house.
5. When I was little, I wanted to be a model. I don't know why.
6. I don't feel like I have any special talents. I have areas that I'm ok in, and I try to be better. I started this blog because I wanted to work on my writing skills.
7. Secretly *(until now...)*, I want my blog to be really popular, like the blogs I read all the time. I know how silly that sounds.
8. People always tell me they admire how straight forward I am, but really, I filter about 90% of what I want to say.
9. I want more tattoos, but I don't know where to put them.
10. I am never happy with the purse I have. Never.
11. I want to be a hat person. They always look weird on me.
12. My mom called me her butterfly when I was little because I always wanted to be on the move. This is still true; I'm hoping it helps the whole married to a Marine thing. Hooray for travel!
13. I over think EVERYTHING. I am still nervous about an issue that happened with two friends in December.
14. My husband will tell you that my biggest weakness is my insanely low self confidence. It's true.
15. As much as I want more kids, I'm truly petrified that I'll treat them differently than I treat Bug. I don't want to, and I'm hoping that helps.
16. I majored in English in college. I still have panic attacks thinking about how stupid I felt in class.
17. Though I love my husband with all my heart, it frustrates me how much I depend on him. I liked being an independent person.
18. I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up. I hate that. I admire those people who have always known what they wanted to do, or who fell in to something perfect for them. I am not like that, and it sucks.
19. I miss being younger. Not because it was 'easier,' but because my extended family was so different. It's hard to grow up and see the flaws in people.
20. I am SUPER judgemental. And once I make my mind up, it's really hard for me to change it. I kind of hate that about me, though usually I'm right.
21. I am addicted to my iPhone.
22. Nothing makes me happier than an email from a friend. But I suck at returning them.
23. B and I are opposites in probably every way possible. For example, if he knew I couldn't grab a button, he would laugh at me for five minutes. But I couldn't convince him that it was a good idea to pack a book for the flight to NC. When we came here, I had six in my carry on.
24. Years ago, my mom bought me an eBook. I hated it, but I couldn't tell her, because I felt horrible that she spent so much money on it. I just couldn't wrap my head around not holding a book. Last summer, my husband bought me a Kindle. I love it. Mom thinks the eBook she bought me broke in the move. I still feel guilty about lying, but I honestly think it was better to do that than to hurt her feelings.
25. Even though I am a liberal hippie, I still have faith in my government and honestly think that 95% of the choices they make are for good reason. I do NOT think it is necessary for Joe Schmoe to know that reasoning. That's why we elected these people. I think it's because my dad was a cop - I just grew up with the understanding that people in certain positions knew more than I did about what they were dealing with, and should be trusted to make the right choice.

Ok, that was really fun. I'll keep trying. I'm way behind, but oh well. :)

Alright, time to put Bug to bed *(ok, really, I should have done that about 2 hours ago...)*, and head there myself.